Hurricane what?

In 1953, The National Hurricane Center began naming storms, rather than relying on the old system of map coordinates for identification. Originally, all storms were named for women, but, starting in 1979, men's and women's names were alternated.

An international committee of the World Meteorological Organization now creates and maintains the annual lists. Names are used on a six-year rotation, meaning the 2005 list will come up again in 2011. (See this year's hurricane season outlook) Names of especially damaging and deadly storms are retired. From the 2004 list, Charley, Frances, Ivan and Jeanne -- four major hurricanes that struck Florida -- will not reappear when the list returns in 2010.

On this year's list, Franklin and Lee replace Floyd and Lenny, which were retired in 1999.

For 2005, Atlantic tropical storms will be named:
Arlene
Bret
Cindy
Dennis
Emily
Franklin
Gert
Harvey
Irene
Jose
Katrina
Lee
Maria
Nate
Ophelia
Philippe
Rita
Stan
Tammy
Vince
Wilma

I'd love to head that naming committee. I'd whore the names out, selling them to corporate sponsors. Can't you just see the TropicAOL Storm graphics now? Sure, there's always the risk that, say, Tropical Storm IBM might turn into Hurricane IBM and kill a few hundred people, but even that can be spun positively with the right marketing.

We're just that powerful... IBM.

or

Our products won't peter out either... IBM.

But most Tropical Storms would just blow a little bit, providing a few days of corporate visibility and a few sound bites. And the corporate money could be put into the federal disaster management funds, defraying the absurd costs.

Most importantly, Gert and Wilma can retire. Those names conjure up a type oncompatible with a potentially crushing weather front.

dowdy

noun

A colorless and primly sedate person; a frump.